The following post contains excerpts from Week 3 of the Fortify Program. To find more useful tips to aid you in recovery, check out the full program.
If you’ve ever watched a champion chess player in action, you know that they destroy their competition because of their planning and organization— they’re always three or four (or ten steps) ahead of everyone else.
No matter the opponent, if they’re even a half step behind the Chess Master, they will eventually lose the match.
Can you see how this relates to your journey to freedom? If not, we’re getting there.
Planning Out Your Recovery
Similar to a Chess Master planning out his battle strategy, true recovery comes when we decide where we want to be, and outline how exactly we are going to get there. These plans, combined with anything already making a difference in your life, make up what we like to call your Freedom Plan— an individualized and comprehensive blueprint for your future that would make any architect or engineer proud. And you can print it off at any time. We encourage you to come back to it often— reviewing, polishing and adding any new insights about reaching the life you want.
Researchers at Stanford University have been studying what happens when people step back from dramatic change requiring high levels of motivation— to focus instead on lots of smaller, even “tiny” changes that require less force of will. Dr. B.J. Fogg puts it this way: “If you plant a tiny seed in the right spot it will grow without coaxing”; meaning, if we create many tiny habits in our own lives, they will combine to lead us in the direction we want to go naturally.
How To Create Your Freedom Plan
Now there are lots of possible tiny habits that could really make a difference for you. Like entrepreneurs who keep refining and honing their business plan, this can be an ongoing process until it’s just right. So stay open to new ideas, brainstorming anything and everything that could possibly help. And whenever you come across something resonates with you, make a note in your Freedom Plan as a way to not forget it! Otherwise, it just becomes another “cool thing” we liked and let pass.
And obviously, everyone’s background is different, which means everyone’s plan will also be unique. This is no cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all plan. Ultimately, we hope you’ll follow your gut to determine what’s right for you, and at what pace, and in what order.
The True Purpose Of Your Freedom Plan
Done right, most of your Freedom Plan won’t focus on pornography at all. Instead, you’ll be reinforcing, building up and honing the life that is already right under your feet.
While we hope you experience real improvement during your time in Fortify, our real aim is to lay a foundation for the years ahead. That’s where your Freedom Plan will really shine. As Victor Hugo once said, “Each individual should frame life so that at some future hour fact and dreaming meet.”
Rather than putting your dreams on a timeline or deadline, the aim here is to be committed for as long as it takes – setting in place habits and plans that can help you reach the life that you want. Beyond all the good intentions and high hopes for change, this is the kind of thing that people serious about lasting freedom do. So if that’s what you’re aiming for…well, let’s make sure we’ve got a plan that has a chance at getting you there!